tell me who I am

Someday soon I will know who I am. It's ironic that I need to be told who I am by someone else, but that's just the way it is for me. I have serious doubts about myself. I'm uncertain. I have a heart and mind that are out of sync. I'm divided. I feel like I'm both a hero and the worst of us. A champion and someone of great shame. I shouldn't feel like this. 

What do you see in me? Could you ever know the turmoil inside of me that I keep buried inside? What would a single glance tell you? Do you have any idea what I've lost? No one will ever understand. I may very well be the biggest loser in all of mankind.